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+ | ====== Severance: The Lexington Letter (Transcript) ====== | ||
+ | [// | ||
+ | |||
+ | TO: JIM M (jm@topekastar.com)\\ | ||
+ | FROM: DARIA T (dt@topekastar.com)\\ | ||
+ | SENT: November 12 at 12:43 PM\\ | ||
+ | SUBJECT LINE: Lumon letter\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | Hey Jim, | ||
+ | I received the letter below from a Severed employee at Lumon.\\ | ||
+ | I also scanned the employee handbook that she mentions in her\\ | ||
+ | letter here too, so that’s attached.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | The whole thing seems pretty out there… but perhaps worth\\ | ||
+ | pursuing? What do you think? | ||
+ | |||
+ | Daria\\ | ||
+ | —\\ | ||
+ | Daria Thorne, Reporter\\ | ||
+ | //The Topeka Star// | ||
+ | |||
+ | Attachment 1 of 2:\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | [// | ||
+ | |||
+ | PLEASE READ IMMEDIATELY\\ | ||
+ | Daria Thorne\\ | ||
+ | c/o //The Topeka Star// | ||
+ | Saturday, November 10\\ | ||
+ | Dear Ms. Thorne, | ||
+ | |||
+ | My name is Peg Kincaid. Until yesterday, I was an\\ | ||
+ | employee at Lumon Industries here in Topeka. I’m\\ | ||
+ | writing on behalf of myself and my friend, Peggy K,\\ | ||
+ | who is now no longer with us. Maybe it’s strange to call\\ | ||
+ | her my friend, but it’s how I think of her. Depending on\\ | ||
+ | how much you know about Lumon and what they do,\\ | ||
+ | maybe you already know what I mean.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | I chose to reach out to you because I’ve seen, among\\ | ||
+ | other things, your thorough coverage of the Dorner\\ | ||
+ | truck incident on November third. I thought about\\ | ||
+ | going to the cops with what I’m about to tell you, but\\ | ||
+ | people say Lumon has a lot of connections with the\\ | ||
+ | police and City Hall and so I don’t think they would\\ | ||
+ | believe me anyway. I hope you believe me. I really\\ | ||
+ | need someone to believe me.\\ | ||
+ | \\ | ||
+ | With that in mind, I’m going to try to give you the full\\ | ||
+ | story. Forgive me if I get a bit rambly… I tend to go on\\ | ||
+ | and on when I’m nervous. And I’m really very nervous\\ | ||
+ | about this. Right now, I’m staying in a motel because I\\ | ||
+ | can’t shake the feeling that someone has been watching\\ | ||
+ | me. The same black cars seem to always be parked\\ | ||
+ | next to mine. And for the last few weeks, my mail has\\ | ||
+ | been all crumpled when I’ve gotten it at night, like\\ | ||
+ | someone’s digging through it. It all feels so off.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | So yes, I just want to get this all written down, in case\\ | ||
+ | something happens. Something beyond what’s already\\ | ||
+ | happened. Alright. Here goes: | ||
+ | |||
+ | As a bit of background (I think, in your field, you call\\ | ||
+ | it " | ||
+ | bus driver for Clover Elementary down off Route 2.\\ | ||
+ | I’d been there for about twelve years. I loved my job. I\\ | ||
+ | love kids, even though I don’t have any of my own. And\\ | ||
+ | I sincerely believe they liked me too. At some point, | ||
+ | the kids learned that I was the youngest driver on the\\ | ||
+ | school’s payroll (even though I was already fifty), so they\\ | ||
+ | gave me the nickname "Baby Driver," | ||
+ | beloved action film of the same name. But despite this\\ | ||
+ | fun camaraderie and my relative youth, I’ll confess I was\\ | ||
+ | starting to feel burned out. My route had gotten longer, I\\ | ||
+ | had a few real misbehavers, | ||
+ | |||
+ | It all came to a boiling point one day in February.\\ | ||
+ | It was a cold day; the kind I used to call a " | ||
+ | freezer" | ||
+ | fundamentalist mom heard about it and complained. I\\ | ||
+ | was near the end of my afternoon route when, through\\ | ||
+ | no fault of my own, my bus hit black ice. I pumped\\ | ||
+ | the brakes, as per protocol, but our momentum kept\\ | ||
+ | us sliding and for the first time in my career in child\\ | ||
+ | transpo, I landed my rig in a ditch.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | All the kids screamed. I wanted to scream too, but\\ | ||
+ | you know how it is — gotta be the adult. Thank the\\ | ||
+ | good lord no one was hurt, just shook up. But we were\\ | ||
+ | stuck for nearly two hours, with the heat knocked out.\\ | ||
+ | The kids were crying, scared, cold, asking for their\\ | ||
+ | mommies. We had three urination events, which in the\\ | ||
+ | low temperature proved a real issue. Finally, another\\ | ||
+ | bus was able to come by and get my kids. I remained\\ | ||
+ | with the vehicle (again, protocol), and listened to the\\ | ||
+ | radio to try to stay warm. I don’t know, it made sense\\ | ||
+ | at the time.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | Now this is the part that, when I look back, still makes\\ | ||
+ | me squirm. While I was sitting there waiting for the\\ | ||
+ | tow, boogers freezing, I distinctly remember thinking\\ | ||
+ | to myself, "Fuck this job". I may have even said it out\\ | ||
+ | loud, I’m not sure. But I either thought it or said it,\\ | ||
+ | and right at that moment, as if it had heard me, this ad\\ | ||
+ | came on the radio. It was an employment recruiting\\ | ||
+ | ad, but they were weirdly vague about the job. Lot of\\ | ||
+ | flowery talk about " | ||
+ | the notion of work." I was sort of tuning out until the\\ | ||
+ | end when they said the name of the company: Lumon\\ | ||
+ | Industries. I knew who they were — I’d been using\\ | ||
+ | their deodorant since puberty — but I didn’t know\\ | ||
+ | they had a branch in Topeka. I remember thinking\\ | ||
+ | "Well, that was weird" | ||
+ | |||
+ | Anyway, two hours later, the tow truck finally came\\ | ||
+ | and yanked my rig from the ditch. I got home five\\ | ||
+ | hours later than usual, with an angry voicemail from\\ | ||
+ | my supervisor accusing me of driving recklessly. I\\ | ||
+ | wasn’t asking for a medal or anything, but a word of\\ | ||
+ | acknowledgement over the hell I’d just been through\\ | ||
+ | would have felt more appropriate than a chewing out.\\ | ||
+ | That night, I told myself I needed to start looking for a\\ | ||
+ | new job.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | I was off the next day, and I went downtown to run\\ | ||
+ | a few errands. On the way home, I passed what I\\ | ||
+ | realized must be the new Lumon site, which had been\\ | ||
+ | under construction for the past few months. It was a\\ | ||
+ | big building that looked almost like a mall. I thought\\ | ||
+ | back to when I’d heard their ad while shivering in that\\ | ||
+ | freezing bus. And even though I had ice cream in the\\ | ||
+ | trunk, I found myself turning into the parking lot. I\\ | ||
+ | parked, and I went in.\\ | ||
+ | \\ | ||
+ | At first I figured no high tech company would hire\\ | ||
+ | someone like me. I mean, I only got through a few\\ | ||
+ | semesters at Kansas State. But the nice Lumon lady\\ | ||
+ | who greeted me told me that didn’t matter. She said\\ | ||
+ | that I could get a great office job, incredible benefits, | ||
+ | manageable hours, and all I had to do was this tiny\\ | ||
+ | little procedure called Severance.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | I’m guessing you know what that is. Well, I didn’t — \\ | ||
+ | remember, this was a few years back and it took them\\ | ||
+ | longer than it probably should have to explain it to me.\\ | ||
+ | They told me that after a screening process, I’d have a\\ | ||
+ | small, totally painless chip inserted into my brain. That\\ | ||
+ | freaked me out for a beat, but they assured me it was\\ | ||
+ | easier than getting a cavity filled. Then they told me that\\ | ||
+ | the chip would make it so I wouldn’t remember work.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | That was the real benefit here: I’d have absolutely no\\ | ||
+ | memory of work. Never. I’d just go into the office\\ | ||
+ | and the chip would turn on in my brain, activating\\ | ||
+ | my work self — my " | ||
+ | That person would do all the work. And then when\\ | ||
+ | I’d leave work, the chip would turn off, and I’d be\\ | ||
+ | back and have the whole rest of my day ahead of me.\\ | ||
+ | No memory of work and four times the pay? Despite\\ | ||
+ | it being quite a drastic procedure, all that made it\\ | ||
+ | feel like, well — a no brainer. Or, ha, a half-brainer? | ||
+ | Because of Severance? You get it? Sorry. My dad\\ | ||
+ | always hated it when I joked when I was nervous, but\\ | ||
+ | here we are!\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | So where was I? Right. Back to Lumon. I got the\\ | ||
+ | procedure, I was Severed, all that, and it was totally\\ | ||
+ | fine. They even gave me a really nice four-cheese\\ | ||
+ | panini afterward because my procedure time slot\\ | ||
+ | butted up against the lunch hour. I thought, "This is so\\ | ||
+ | great! What a great place to work!" | ||
+ | |||
+ | I was wrong. Very very wrong. But I wouldn’t learn\\ | ||
+ | that for another two years.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | I started at Lumon the following Monday and settled\\ | ||
+ | into this nice day-to-day routine. I’d show up at work, | ||
+ | swipe my fancy Lumon badge and then change out of\\ | ||
+ | my outdoor clothes and into some Lumon neutrals, as\\ | ||
+ | they call’em which means no labels, tags, patterns, | ||
+ | no words at all, on anything. Company policy. Lumon\\ | ||
+ | wanted a complete divide between innies and us\\ | ||
+ | people on the outside, a.k.a. the outies. No written\\ | ||
+ | word, no messages back and forth were allowed — all\\ | ||
+ | of that is what you sign up for when you get Severed.\\ | ||
+ | In my orientation, | ||
+ | detectors built into the elevators that would sense\\ | ||
+ | written words. It was a fancy place.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | Then, after changing my clothes, I’d take the elevator\\ | ||
+ | down to the Severed floor in the basement and then\\ | ||
+ | — nothing. Sweet sweet nothing. In the middle of\\ | ||
+ | the elevator ride, my Severance chip would switch\\ | ||
+ | my consciousness over to my innie, this whole\\ | ||
+ | other personality, | ||
+ | in Topeka. She could walk and talk and all that, but\\ | ||
+ | didn’t remember, say, my third-grade teacher’s name, | ||
+ | or me falling off a horse and breaking my arm when I\\ | ||
+ | was eight, or when my ex-husband told me he wanted\\ | ||
+ | a divorce. Lucky girl.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | She was ME, but NOT me.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | So yeah, my innie would wake up and head to work\\ | ||
+ | — doing whatever it is my innie did down there. Some\\ | ||
+ | desk job with data, I’d been told. And meanwhile, the\\ | ||
+ | other half of the brain that is, ME — would basically\\ | ||
+ | get to just take a nap for the day. At the end of the\\ | ||
+ | workday, I’d come to, in that same elevator, maybe a\\ | ||
+ | little tired after what I assume was a hard day’s work, | ||
+ | but otherwise none the wiser for earning that paycheck.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | And that’s how it went, day in and day out, for two\\ | ||
+ | years. Until one particular Tuesday, when I messed it\\ | ||
+ | all up. Or, actually, we messed it all up.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | That Tuesday, I got off work — in other words, I came\\ | ||
+ | to in that elevator — and went to my locker. Nothing\\ | ||
+ | odd there. But then, as I was pulling on my jacket, I felt\\ | ||
+ | something in my pants pocket — a surprise, since we’re\\ | ||
+ | not supposed to bring anything in or out. I pulled out\\ | ||
+ | a half-sheet of typing paper, neatly folded into pocket\\ | ||
+ | size. Seeing that the upstairs security guard was busy\\ | ||
+ | watching soccer on his phone, I opened it up.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | Now, at this point, I need to back up again and give you\\ | ||
+ | more " | ||
+ | reason. My sister Meryl is only about eleven months\\ | ||
+ | older than me. We actually were born in the same year, | ||
+ | funnily enough. We’ve since grown apart as time’s gone\\ | ||
+ | by, but as kids we were really close. In fact, we were so\\ | ||
+ | close that we invented a secret language together, called\\ | ||
+ | Puglish. We’d write long letters to each other about\\ | ||
+ | what boys we liked or teachers we hated in Puglish\\ | ||
+ | so no one else could understand. I say " | ||
+ | but actually, all we did was replace each letter with\\ | ||
+ | a different symbol. " | ||
+ | lightning bolt. " | ||
+ | in trouble once or twice, but not too often because it’s\\ | ||
+ | an uncommon letter and we were sneaky. Anyway, like\\ | ||
+ | I said, Meryl and I had grown apart over time, and I\\ | ||
+ | hadn’t thought about Puglish, let alone read or written\\ | ||
+ | it, for more than thirty years.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | So, on that Tuesday at Lumon, you can imagine my\\ | ||
+ | surprise when I unfolded the paper and found it lined\\ | ||
+ | with rows of little seahorses, lightning bolts, and other\\ | ||
+ | distantly familiar symbols. There was even a boobs in\\ | ||
+ | the second paragraph. I stood there, baffled at how a\\ | ||
+ | full note in perfect Puglish had ended up in my pocket\\ | ||
+ | while I was down on the Severed floor.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | I took the note home and looked it over. It was strange how\\ | ||
+ | quickly my memory of our code came back to me, and I\\ | ||
+ | was able to read the message almost as if it had been in\\ | ||
+ | English. Understanding its contents proved a little harder: | ||
+ | |||
+ | //Dear Peggy K,\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | I don’t know what this language is, or why it’s in\\ | ||
+ | my head. It’s been coming to me slowly over the\\ | ||
+ | past few weeks. I find myself writing it at my desk. I\\ | ||
+ | thought if anyone would know what it was, maybe it\\ | ||
+ | would be you. I don’t know if this will even pass the\\ | ||
+ | code detectors, but I felt I had to try. I know this is\\ | ||
+ | a breach in protocol. Please don’t be angry with me.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | If you cannot tell, I am your innie. I live down here in\\ | ||
+ | the Macrodata Refining Department, with my three\\ | ||
+ | co-workers. I have often thought of you and what your\\ | ||
+ | life might be like out there, and why I exist in the first\\ | ||
+ | place. Why does one choose to get Severed? | ||
+ | |||
+ | Maybe this language isn’t real and I’m writing\\ | ||
+ | nonsense. But if you can read this, I would love for\\ | ||
+ | you to write me back. I understand if that is not\\ | ||
+ | possible. I do not mean any harm.\\ | ||
+ | Sincerely, your innie, | ||
+ | Peggy K\\ // | ||
+ | — \\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | Well, this knocked me on my ass, I’ll be honest. I\\ | ||
+ | hadn’t really given my innie too much thought before\\ | ||
+ | then. Like, I knew she was down there, doing her thing, | ||
+ | but part of what I loved so much about this whole\\ | ||
+ | Severance thing is that I didn’t need to think about it.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | But then there she was — Peggy, my innie, writing\\ | ||
+ | to me. In Puglish. I stared at it for a long time. It also\\ | ||
+ | tripped me up because I hadn’t been called Peggy since\\ | ||
+ | elementary school. I’d been told during training that\\ | ||
+ | my innie would be like a little kid, with little to no life\\ | ||
+ | experiences, | ||
+ | |||
+ | I stared at that note for the rest of the night. I thought\\ | ||
+ | of her, or me, or a different version of me I guess, | ||
+ | down there in the dark, on the Severed floor, clearly\\ | ||
+ | desperate for more information.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | I was really torn about what to do. I loved my job, or\\ | ||
+ | what I knew about it, and I didn’t wanna mess that up.\\ | ||
+ | Writing messages to my innie was definitely against\\ | ||
+ | Lumon policy, there’s no question about that. Was it\\ | ||
+ | possible a code invented by two grade-schoolers could\\ | ||
+ | be enough to trick the detectors? Granted, it was a\\ | ||
+ | new technology, but still!\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | To this day, a part of me wishes I’d done what I\\ | ||
+ | was supposed to: Call my Lumon supervisor, Mr.\\ | ||
+ | Alvarado, and report my innie’s infraction. But\\ | ||
+ | sometimes, at the end of the day, I’d come out of the\\ | ||
+ | elevator feeling, I don’t know… different than I’d\\ | ||
+ | ever felt before. Maybe a little giddy or sometimes all\\ | ||
+ | wound up, or scared even, and it made me wonder: | ||
+ | What were they doing down there with my body? | ||
+ | |||
+ | So, the next morning, I decided to write her back — \\ | ||
+ | just this once — and ask her.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | She wrote back right away — I got a message in my\\ | ||
+ | pocket that next night. She told me she worked as a\\ | ||
+ | Macrodata Refiner. When I asked her what that means, | ||
+ | she told me it involved working at a computer, putting\\ | ||
+ | these special numbers into special bins, which made\\ | ||
+ | no sense to me — that’s a JOB?? And I’m making four\\ | ||
+ | times as much as when I was driving a bus? | ||
+ | |||
+ | Once the floodgates were opened, I couldn’t help\\ | ||
+ | myself — I wrote back to her more and more, asking\\ | ||
+ | follow-up questions. She responded with such a weird\\ | ||
+ | description that I had to write it down here: | ||
+ | |||
+ | //The best I’ve come up with is that the numbers make\\ | ||
+ | you feel things. It’s not an individual number, but a\\ | ||
+ | whole cluster of them, and after a while, they’ll sort\\ | ||
+ | of *throb* a certain emotion at you. Sometimes it’s\\ | ||
+ | joy or sadness or worry. Sometimes it’s obvious, | ||
+ | other times more subtle. Each type of number\\ | ||
+ | has its own designation, | ||
+ | called MA. Once you’ve identified the numbers, you\\ | ||
+ | surround them with the arrow on your computer\\ | ||
+ | and into a bin they go.\\ // | ||
+ | |||
+ | I want to take a moment, Ms. Thorne, and say that th1S\\ | ||
+ | sounded as nuts to me as it does to you. These numbers\\ | ||
+ | made her feel things? Peggy tried to help me out, and\\ | ||
+ | describe it more, but the more detail she’d go into, the\\ | ||
+ | more confused I got. I asked her if the numbers ever\\ | ||
+ | ended. She told me yes, when you finish a file. I guess\\ | ||
+ | there’s a whole wall of them on her computer screen, | ||
+ | but eventually, the wall runs out, and all the numbers\\ | ||
+ | have been sorted, and that’s that file completed.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | Peggy told me that they get prizes when they finish the\\ | ||
+ | files: Some weird stuff, like a melon bar and something\\ | ||
+ | called a " | ||
+ | It all sounded pretty infantilizing to me, but I hope they\\ | ||
+ | at least get different types of syrups to go along with\\ | ||
+ | those waffles.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | It wasn’t always me drilling her though — she also\\ | ||
+ | asked me things too. And over and over again, I was\\ | ||
+ | beside myself with how much it felt like I was talking\\ | ||
+ | to a kid-version of, well, myself. She wanted to know\\ | ||
+ | everything about outside life, like what it felt like to\\ | ||
+ | be drunk, or asleep (I’d never thought of it before, but\\ | ||
+ | she’d never been asleep, because I do all that on the\\ | ||
+ | outside!), or to fall in love (that one was a toughie to\\ | ||
+ | answer, just ask my ex-husband) or to have someone\\ | ||
+ | you love die. It was strange to see how the procedure\\ | ||
+ | filtered her knowledge. She knew what beer was but\\ | ||
+ | couldn’t name a specific brand. She knew she lived in\\ | ||
+ | America but couldn’t draw a map of it to save her life.\\ | ||
+ | She knew that movies exist, but not who David Niven\\ | ||
+ | was (despite him being by far my longest-standing\\ | ||
+ | crush). It was like she’d seen only the vaguest shape of\\ | ||
+ | the world through a foggy window.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | She asked me what snow felt like (I sat on that one\\ | ||
+ | for a while, and finally came up with holding a cold\\ | ||
+ | cotton shirt that melts in your hands), and if I knew\\ | ||
+ | how to ride a bike. (I do. Not very well, but I don’t tip\\ | ||
+ | over either.) And if I ever regretted getting Severed. To\\ | ||
+ | be honest, I hadn’t — until I thought more about her\\ | ||
+ | sitting down there, in the dark.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | So anyway, yes, Peggy and I wrote these letters back\\ | ||
+ | and forth for, I don’t know, maybe three or four weeks.\\ | ||
+ | Not every day, but enough that it started to feel like…\\ | ||
+ | this sounds crazy, but like I’d found a new friend. She\\ | ||
+ | made me see my life in a different way. I used to think\\ | ||
+ | my life was boring, and pretty mundane, but Peggy\\ | ||
+ | found all the little details I’d mention fascinating, | ||
+ | glamorous. Once I painted my nails hot pink (which is\\ | ||
+ | really not my style), just to see what she’d think. That\\ | ||
+ | night, she wrote me back saying tears had sprung to her\\ | ||
+ | eyes, our nails were so beautiful.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | Sorry, I could go on forever. Like I told you, I ramble\\ | ||
+ | when I get nervous and I’m jumping out of my chair\\ | ||
+ | over here. No joke — Housekeeping just knocked on\\ | ||
+ | my motel room door and I shrieked.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | So anyway — Me and Peggy kept thinking we’d get\\ | ||
+ | caught, but nothing seemed to come of it. Peggy grew\\ | ||
+ | concerned that their head of security, Mr. Dooley — a\\ | ||
+ | "pale little man with a terrifying smile" was watching\\ | ||
+ | her more closely than usual. She described seeing him at\\ | ||
+ | the far end of the hall when she’d leave for the day, " | ||
+ | standing there, smiling. Like he knew what I was doing\\ | ||
+ | but wanted to play with me a while before dragging me\\ | ||
+ | to the Break Room." I asked her what the Break Room\\ | ||
+ | was, but she never told me. Despite the forbidden nature\\ | ||
+ | of our whole interaction, | ||
+ | topic she was afraid to broach.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | Still, those code detectors never seemed to bother us\\ | ||
+ | or pick up the Puglish. If they had, I would’ve cut it\\ | ||
+ | off, played dumb, blamed my own idiocy — and never\\ | ||
+ | Peggy’s — but it never happened.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | But then we get to that morning of Friday, November\\ | ||
+ | 3rd, which is why I’m writing to you in the first place.\\ | ||
+ | I come-to in the elevator as usual that night and check\\ | ||
+ | my pockets, just like I’ve been doing for months\\ | ||
+ | — and there’s another note from Peggy. And she’s\\ | ||
+ | really excited. She finished her file, which was named\\ | ||
+ | " | ||
+ | says she’s been so excited to tell me about it that she\\ | ||
+ | could barely wait to go home, even if it meant cutting\\ | ||
+ | her melon bar party (???) short.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | She told me that the Lexington file had been extra\\ | ||
+ | complicated and particularly exhausting to do (this made\\ | ||
+ | sense to me — I’d felt fried for the last few weeks after\\ | ||
+ | coming-to in the elevator and didn’t know why). She said\\ | ||
+ | she’d pushed through and completed it and that everyone\\ | ||
+ | at Lumon, including her boss and her boss’ boss, was\\ | ||
+ | thrilled with her work. They’d even given her an extra\\ | ||
+ | melon bar party to cash in later in the week. Whoopee, | ||
+ | right? Again, I don’t fully get this whole refining-files\\ | ||
+ | thing, but a big win at work makes me look good too, | ||
+ | so what the hell. And our whole body just felt JAZZED\\ | ||
+ | when I came to in the elevator, which wasn’t a bad\\ | ||
+ | feeling either. I drove home and went for a jog for the\\ | ||
+ | first time in weeks. I felt like I could tackle the world.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | Later that same night, I’m watching TV and I see you, | ||
+ | Ms. Thorne, on the news. Your face was as serious as\\ | ||
+ | I’ve ever seen it, your voice steadfast and resolute, as\\ | ||
+ | you reported about the truck that had been blown up in\\ | ||
+ | New York at 2:32 pm that day. The Dorner Therapeutics\\ | ||
+ | truck. Dorner, of course, is a major competitor of my\\ | ||
+ | now former employer Lumon. God, watching that\\ | ||
+ | footage made my heart stop. Seeing bystanders running\\ | ||
+ | for cover, the destroyed street, all of it seemed like hell.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | That’s when a sudden, intrusive thought dumped a hard\\ | ||
+ | knot right into the pit of my stomach. I looked back at\\ | ||
+ | my earlier note from Peggy, and read again when she’d\\ | ||
+ | completed the Lexington File.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | __The time had been 2:30 pm.__\\ | ||
+ | Two minutes before the bomb went off.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | I was stunned. I tried to tell myself I was being\\ | ||
+ | paranoid, but I couldn’t stop the thoughts from coming.\\ | ||
+ | Two people were burned alive in a truck. Four others\\ | ||
+ | were dead, too. No explanation, | ||
+ | claiming credit. The next day, Dorner said that some of\\ | ||
+ | their devices had been destroyed. Their prototypes or\\ | ||
+ | whatever. It almost seems like this was some kind of\\ | ||
+ | corporate espionage.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | It all seems like too much of a coincidence, | ||
+ | Is that why these numbers are making the innies down\\ | ||
+ | there feel things? Because they’re dropping bombs or\\ | ||
+ | blowing things up from down there? What had I gotten\\ | ||
+ | my body — and my innie, __my friend__ — into? | ||
+ | |||
+ | I barely slept that weekend. On Monday morning, I\\ | ||
+ | wrote Peggy another note, asking her to send me any\\ | ||
+ | information she could about the file she’d just refined.\\ | ||
+ | Told her it was super important. She didn’t know\\ | ||
+ | anything about the Dorner truck down there, of course, | ||
+ | but I tried to press her more about the numbers. I asked\\ | ||
+ | her: What do her bosses tell her about the numbers? | ||
+ | About Lexington in particular? What is this data they’re\\ | ||
+ | refining? Not much, she said, other than it being very\\ | ||
+ | important work. Finally, I worked up the nerve to tell\\ | ||
+ | her about the truck. It took me over an hour to write\\ | ||
+ | that note. I told her I couldn’t be sure there was a\\ | ||
+ | connection, but that the timing felt too close to ignore.\\ | ||
+ | I told her not to refine another number down there, no\\ | ||
+ | matter the consequences. I told her that, if I was right, | ||
+ | then Lumon had been using us both for something\\ | ||
+ | insidious and horrifying. I told her none of this was her\\ | ||
+ | fault. And that I loved her.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | I didn’t hear back.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | A day passed, then three. Every day I went down, | ||
+ | hoping to feel the familiar pressure of a note in my\\ | ||
+ | pants pocket as I came back up. But there was nothing.\\ | ||
+ | Was she mad at me? Horrified by my claim? Or was it\\ | ||
+ | something else? Was there something stopping Peggy\\ | ||
+ | from responding? | ||
+ | |||
+ | It’s a funny thing, worrying about your innie. I was\\ | ||
+ | leaving each day without a scratch on me, and I was\\ | ||
+ | certainly still alive, which meant that physically Peggy\\ | ||
+ | had to be fine. But her silence every evening grew\\ | ||
+ | more terrifying as the days turned to weeks. I wanted\\ | ||
+ | to write her again, ask what was going on — but\\ | ||
+ | was Lumon on to us? If so, another note could spell\\ | ||
+ | disaster for my dear friend.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | One Tuesday, I emerged to find my hair wet. A note\\ | ||
+ | on my windshield from Lumon informed me that my\\ | ||
+ | innie had had a " | ||
+ | with the water cooler" | ||
+ | Murray’s All-Day Breakfast Buffet as an apology for\\ | ||
+ | the inconvenience. That night, over hashbrowns, my\\ | ||
+ | mind raced. What the hell were they doing to her down\\ | ||
+ | there each day? How could I help? Should I resign? | ||
+ | Since Lumon was the only place she was alive, quitting\\ | ||
+ | would essentially mean killing her. Surely, I couldn’t\\ | ||
+ | do that, no matter how bad things had gotten.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | It was two weeks later when, upon ascending for the\\ | ||
+ | evening, I felt something thick and firm tucked in the\\ | ||
+ | back of my waistband. I struggled to show no emotion\\ | ||
+ | as I went to my locker, retrieved my personal items, | ||
+ | and went out to my car. When I was safely off Lumon\\ | ||
+ | property, I breathlessly pulled it out and saw a faded, | ||
+ | spiral-bound booklet with a teal cover marked " | ||
+ | Macrodata Refiner’s Orientation Booklet." | ||
+ | taped to the front, written in the King’s English in my\\ | ||
+ | very own handwriting: | ||
+ | |||
+ | **Dooley found your last note. Been in Break Room.\\ | ||
+ | Don’t know how long.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | Think you’re right about Lexington.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | Lumon updating code detectors but they’re down\\ | ||
+ | today. Hope this booklet gives clarity.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | Be careful. I love you too.\\ ** | ||
+ | |||
+ | I opened the booklet and was startled to find an eerily\\ | ||
+ | chipper creature smiling up at me from the page. He\\ | ||
+ | looked — pardon my indelicacy — like a little dildo with\\ | ||
+ | translucent skin revealing a spiral-shaped digestive tract\\ | ||
+ | leading down to his anus. After reading his intro, I\\ | ||
+ | learned that this was " | ||
+ | and the internal mascot Lumon uses to train its innies.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | Describing this document is probably a fool’s errand, | ||
+ | so I’m enclosing it here for you to look at too. I’ve\\ | ||
+ | spent hours going over it, trying to decipher what the\\ | ||
+ | numbers might mean, as explained by the all-knowing\\ | ||
+ | Sevy. Maybe you can figure out more, ’cuz to me this\\ | ||
+ | whole thing feels like it was written for a child. That’s\\ | ||
+ | all you’ll tell me about what all this stuff means? The\\ | ||
+ | only thing the handbook says about it is, "We know\\ | ||
+ | you may be curious about what the numbers mean.\\ | ||
+ | However, knowing the true meaning behind the\\ | ||
+ | numbers could inhibit your natural intuition." | ||
+ | |||
+ | Well, my natural freakin’ intuition is telling me\\ | ||
+ | something horrible is happening here.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | After that, I didn’t hear from Peggy for a week. I\\ | ||
+ | didn’t write anything either, worried that Lumon’s\\ | ||
+ | updated code detectors would be able to read Puglish\\ | ||
+ | and I’d land her back in the "Break Room", which I\\ | ||
+ | could tell by now wasn’t a fun place with bean bag\\ | ||
+ | chairs and a pinball machine.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | This brings us to last Friday morning. I sat in my car\\ | ||
+ | in the Lumon lot, trying to mentally prepare for my\\ | ||
+ | strange daily descent, and wondering what horrors the\\ | ||
+ | day held for my dear Peggy. For some reason, I thought\\ | ||
+ | of that moment on the bus, skidding across the ice\\ | ||
+ | with the kids screaming behind me. Knowing I was\\ | ||
+ | responsible for whatever was going to happen to those\\ | ||
+ | children in the coming seconds. As their screams rang\\ | ||
+ | in my head, I did something that contradicted my better\\ | ||
+ | judgment. I grabbed a fast-food receipt out of my cup\\ | ||
+ | holder and hurriedly wrote a note in Puglish. It was a\\ | ||
+ | very quick note. All it said was //"Are you okay?"// | ||
+ | |||
+ | I went into work and descended in the elevator as\\ | ||
+ | usual, trying not to look nervous as I went down.\\ | ||
+ | When I came back up, my heart was RACING, my\\ | ||
+ | palms were sweaty — though of course I didn’t know\\ | ||
+ | why. More troublingly, | ||
+ | in my mouth. I looked at my watch: 9:10 am. Only ten\\ | ||
+ | minutes had passed since I’d gone down.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | Trying to look casual and avoiding eye contact with\\ | ||
+ | the security guard, I made a beeline for my locker.\\ | ||
+ | There, I deftly spat out the object in my mouth, which\\ | ||
+ | I found was a wadded-up sheet of paper. Unable to\\ | ||
+ | wait, I opened it and read: | ||
+ | |||
+ | // | ||
+ | Leave now. Get somewhere safe. They will try to\\ | ||
+ | follow.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | Nothing they say is real.\\ | ||
+ | Distribute the training booklet. Answers are there if\\ | ||
+ | you look.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | Thank you for my life. You were the best part of it.\\ | ||
+ | I’ll be with you always, | ||
+ | |||
+ | Peggy K\\ // | ||
+ | — \\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | And that was it.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | I called Mr. Alvarado and quit on the spot. I left\\ | ||
+ | Topeka without returning home.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | I only wish I could talk to Peggy again, tell her that I\\ | ||
+ | was going to get help for her and for all the Severed\\ | ||
+ | people down there, and that somehow… somehow I’d\\ | ||
+ | get the word out about what Lumon is doing. That\\ | ||
+ | attack killed six people, and I can’t even begin to tell\\ | ||
+ | you why — even though I may have been the one (or\\ | ||
+ | two) who pulled the trigger.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | But the thing that hurts the most is the only way I\\ | ||
+ | could ever talk to Peggy again is to go back to Lumon\\ | ||
+ | to switch my Severance chip back on… and I can’t do\\ | ||
+ | that again. Not ever.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | So instead, here I am, writing to you. I considered\\ | ||
+ | putting this up on social media, but I have about\\ | ||
+ | sixteen friends on there, including my ex-husband, and\\ | ||
+ | figured you could get the word out faster than all that.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | I hope so anyway. For me and for Peggy.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | Thank you for your time, Ms. Thorne. I look forward\\ | ||
+ | to hearing from you as soon as possible. My cell is\\ | ||
+ | 785-555-4332. Please hurry.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | Very sincerely, | ||
+ | Peg Kincaid\\ | ||
+ | \\ | ||
+ | [End of Scanned Pages Attachment]\\ | ||
+ | \\ | ||
+ | [Email from Jim Milchick replying to Daria Thorne]\\ | ||
+ | \\ | ||
+ | Jim M (jm@topekastar.com)\\ | ||
+ | Re: Lumon Letter, November 12 at 12:43 PM\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | TO: Daria T (dt@topekastar.com)\\ | ||
+ | FROM: Jim M (jm@topekastar.com)\\ | ||
+ | SENT: November 13 at 10:03 AM\\ | ||
+ | SUBJECT: RE: Lumon letter\\ | ||
+ | Hey Daria, | ||
+ | |||
+ | Read through this letter. Interesting stuff but all, as you said, | ||
+ | pretty "out there" | ||
+ | |||
+ | I don’t think we have the resources right now to put you on this\\ | ||
+ | type of story. Besides, seems more like a disgruntled employee\\ | ||
+ | making stuff up. I called over to a source I trust implicitly at\\ | ||
+ | Lumon and it sounds like she was let go because of too many\\ | ||
+ | absences.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | Let’s have you focus on the high school basketball playoffs, as\\ | ||
+ | discussed.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | Thanks, | ||
+ | Jim\\ | ||
+ | — \\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | TO: Jim M (jm@topekastar.com)\\ | ||
+ | FROM: Daria T (dt@topekastar.com)\\ | ||
+ | SENT: November 13 at 10:08 am\\ | ||
+ | SUBJECT: RE: Re: Lumon letter\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | You’re sure? I can still file that story and then move onto this.\\ | ||
+ | These allegations, | ||
+ | |||
+ | DT\\ | ||
+ | — \\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | Jim M (jm@topekastar.com)\\ | ||
+ | Re: Lumon Letter, November 12 at 12:43 PM\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | TO: Daria T (dt@topekastar.com)\\ | ||
+ | FROM: Jim M (jm@topekastar.com)\\ | ||
+ | SENT: November 13 at 1:03 pm\\ | ||
+ | SUBJECT: RE: Re: Re: Lumon letter\\ | ||
+ | Too late anyway. Just saw this — from Carolyn over in Obits: | ||
+ | |||
+ | **Margaret " | ||
+ | complications from a car accident on November 11th. She is\\ | ||
+ | survived by her sister, Meryl Rasmussen, of Tacoma, WA, and\\ | ||
+ | a group of supportive and loving friends throughout the Topeka, | ||
+ | KS area. A dedicated school bus driver for several decades, | ||
+ | Peg enjoyed bridge, spy novels, gardening, cats, and David\\ | ||
+ | Niven films. She will be missed by all who knew her. A memorial\\ | ||
+ | service will be on November 20th at 10 am. In lieu of flowers, | ||
+ | please consider a donation to the Topeka Humane Society.// | ||
+ | |||
+ | Tough break. Sorry. Not to sound too harsh here, but all this\\ | ||
+ | might be for the best… her whole letter felt really loose and it’s\\ | ||
+ | not like we want to get into a libel suit with Lumon. You may\\ | ||
+ | remember what happened with the Nashville Tribune when\\ | ||
+ | they printed what they thought was a well-sourced exposé on\\ | ||
+ | Lumon’s feeding tube devices: They got sued into oblivion and\\ | ||
+ | folded six months later.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | Please send me those basketball pages ASAP though. I want to\\ | ||
+ | run them in tomorrow’s edition.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | Jim\\ | ||
+ | — \\ | ||
+ | Jim Milchick, Editor\\ | ||
+ | //The Topeka Star// | ||
+ | \\ | ||
+ | \\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | |||
+ | {{tag> |